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Holiday Survival Fuel – As Delivered By Ivan Drago

With the passing of Thanksgiving (and really, the passing of Halloween) we are now fully interred in Holiday Season — the time we are encouraged to live at our local department stores because Capitalist Santa defeated Socialist Hippie Jesus in the annals of history — as recorded by South Park 20 years ago:

 

So those of us who would pass the holidays in a sealed bunker, existing on saltines and spam — prefer to retreat to the pop cultural gems that make the holidays livable amongst the other humans.  And while there are several worthy candidatesHans Gruber, Die Hard, Christmas, Holiday Season, YouTuber Reveiw

Rocky IV (the last Rocky movie for those of us who are purists) is among them. It represents the end of Rocky Balboa’s reign as heavyweight champion as he accepts a grudge match against cold-war Aryan Superman, Ivan Drago.

 

via GIPHY

Wait, no, that’s not Drago.  That’s modern Aryan Superman and 7’3″ unicorn-Knick, Kristaps Porzingis.

Ivan Drago, Punch Out, YouTuber Review, Rocky IV

That’s Drago.  Kristaps with boxing gloves. Anyway, a YouTuber known as Hat-Loving Gamer has put together a masterwork of 8-bit video composition — extending the classic training cut-scenes from Mike Tyson’s Punchout into the snowy rural,, Russian training montage from Rocky IV.

Bonus points for the Duck Hunt errant rifle shot near the end.

Happy holidays — and to paraphrase Mr. Drago, “It must not break you.”

 

 

 

About Dr Laserfalcon

Dr Laserfalcon is a preeminent scholar, comparative mythologist and video gamesman. He can be found on Twitter @drlaserfalcon tweeting snippets of shamanistic healing wisdom, transhumanistic tropes, and contrarian news coverage -- things you're unlikely to fully comprehend. Don't worry -- he won't judge you for your ignorance -- much.